I'm realizing more and more that I prefer hanging out with smaller groups of people as opposed to the more commonly practiced "everyone's invited" social outing structure. Sure, I love seeing a lot of my friends together in one place, especially if I've been away in Maryland for several weeks prior. But hanging out exclusively at parties in a giant collective dilutes the potential for bonding or catching up or having interactions with much depth to it. Can anyone else relate to this or is it just me? I shouldn't feel almost as disconnected when I'm surrounded by friends as I do when I'm over a hundred miles away.
Hopefully I'll find plenty of opportunities this summer to chill with friends on a more personal basis.
Monday, May 16, 2011
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Welcome to my feelings of the past couple years.
ReplyDeleteSure I love when I'm able to see a lot of people all at once because it can be a lot of fun especially since I don't get to see people as often now. However, I prefer hanging out with groups of like 1-3 other people most of the time because that's when you can really bond and have good conversation with them without it being so diluted.
In a big group, your attention toward each person and their attention towards you is so limited because it has to constantly be bouncing around. In the small group people really listen and connect to each other. I also feel if you don't ever get the chances to hang out with people in the smaller groups it can somewhat threaten the line between being real friends and people that you hang out with when with friends.
I agree completely with both of youz. Recently parties have been making me really uncomfortable and not myself.
ReplyDeleteCan the three of us hang out one day??
I almost never really actually like parties. I have good times at them and they can provide a kind of distraction I sometimes need, but I almost always prefer to hang in small groups or one-on-one with friends. This is one of my favorite songs - http://chrisayer.bandcamp.com/track/vanity - and my favorite lyric in it is, "And baby, the party makes me feel jaded, so lonely and premeditated." That's exactly how I feel at parties 90% of the time. I'd much rather chill in small groups.
ReplyDeleteOn a separate but related note, I hate when people get all like "EVERYONE HUNG OUT BUT YOU DIDN'T INVITE ME? WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME?" when it's not like a personal slight against anyone. Sometimes you just want to keep things low key, and it's easier to do that with fewer people. You can't expect to be everywhere all the time, right?
Also, I am convinced carpooling is a great way to get to know people. I'm pretty sure I got to be friends with you, Keith and Chelsea, and with Mike, because I drove you places. lol. Hooray for carpool bonding!